Not This Again
Hate is a strong word, but it’s the best word to describe how I feel tonight. What I hate is this feeling lingering over me. It’s the feeling of an emotional low point. As if everything you have been working towards is crashing down on you and there’s nothing you can do to stop it or make it any less painful. On the surface everything may look fine, but underneath it all, it’s a hot mess. I am normally a very optimistic and happy person, but it’s nights like this that when I feel down, it’s real bad. I crash hard and I hate it.
I hate the fact that the pillow next to me is cold and unoccupied. I miss little moments like falling asleep while holding hands and waking up the next morning hands still interlocked. I miss whispering sweet good mornings and brushing hair away from the woman’s face. I miss hearing a voice other than mine all the time. I miss the feeling of the warm and fuzzies I get from a hug. I hate that these feelings are keeping me up at night.
Tomorrow will be a new day and these feelings will disappear with the cold of the night.
